Ever heard the saying in Chinese, that if you don't have THAT big a head, don't try wearing big hats.
Or in Malay language, ukur baju di badan sendiri.
Now, if I had passed all my ACCA papers in one attempt, I would be walking around with my head high up, applying for jobs everywhere without second thoughts.
I know my mum kept telling me, there is no harm trying to hand in your application. If you get it, it is a bonus. If you don't, you don't lose anything. But no matter how hard i try, I can't even find the courage to fill up the application forms online.
I can't get rid of the awful thoughts....
"I failed my ACCA last two papers, and now I'm pending my resit result"
"What if I'm asked about it??"
"I don't have a fucking job permit, should I state it clearly in my cover letter?"
"I freaking, seriously think, I don't really stand a job placement in Singapore, let alone one in UK??"
But then again, you never try, you'll never know.
But, when you try, you have hope, and that's when you have expectation. And expectation..IS evil.
Am I even ready for this??
My business knowledge is equivalent to zero.
Confused, and hesitant. I hope God could personally come down and have a proper chat with me.