This whole day was a total messed up day for me. With me having to deal with someone who got me so emotionally fuck up. (and I thought he was an insignificant person in my life)
I come to realise, it's always too early to judge someone, to brand that someone on the forehead, to come up with an impression, to give SIRIM chop (Ning??), .......(and I actually contemplated giving my full commitment??!!!)
Should I blame it on bad timing again? (I'm on holidays and he's busy)
Or should I blame it on his arrogance again? (just like what I did 3 years ago)
Or should I just say........no fate? ( Purrrrfect!!!) Undeniably, blaming it on luck, on God, on fate, is always the easiet thing to do.
I know...being in a relationship is not easy.
Keeping one, and maintaining it in a stable condition....is definitely NOT that easy too.
It requires the effort from two party. The commitment..(oh, I forgot...I did not give mine)....***
okay, I have nothing to say dy.
Ning! If only you're around, I'm positively sure you'll be able to see...and I mean, really see it in me....that I try to be nice!
Ning....I try to be understanding.
Ning.... I learn to apologise. (finally)
Ning....I'm so much more toned down now.
I don't throw my tantrums, get fired up so fast, or start swearing.....(okay, yaya..I know u're shaking your head in disbelief..FINE!! I admit...I do...sometimes).......but Ning, it's not that bad like how I treated you last time! And you survived through my torture chamber!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And you love me more now...lol! :-)
Ning, I always remember what you said last time..."you gotta learn to bend a little"
and I'm not bending a little. I'm bending a lot here.
Haiz...I know you're stress out too..with your sports, and studies there....in Lion Land.
That's why I don't want to trouble you with my probs.
I know, when you're free, you'll eventually check here for my latest updates.
I'm shattered. All I want is to have you here. Bamboo Ning,you may be tall and it's a little hard for panda to cry on your shoulder, but your shoulder is the best to cry on.
Oh, by the way, Ning, don't worry. You know, I fall fast, and I pick myself up pretty quick too. That's how I learn to be tough.
Tomorrow will be a better day for me.