Fair?

Why do people keep talking about wanting fairness in life...equality....yet they don't practise what they preach?
What is the point of wanting the whole world to act fair upon oneself, when one don't treat others with the same amount of fairness?
Why do some people put all the blames on others with no mirror to look at oneself? Self review?
Why do some people, bring others into their life, with no intention to make good out of it?
Why do some people, go on to do the things..though knowingly it will hurt others?
Is it true that I need to make decision in life? Doesn't it sound more like life makes decision for me?
I decided to stay, to fight for what I want. To believe in it, though all I was grabbing on, was just nothing but air. Was I so blind, to fight an uphill battle? Or more so, that I was stupid enough to fight for it?
Yes...decision lies in my hand. And I chose it so. And why doesn't it look like I made the right decision?
So, how can one say, that human needs to make decide on their life?
When all one can see, is how life closes all paths, all routes,leaving one with no other options, no other choices. Is this fair? Is this called fair?

I can't comprehand it. How can one fall..so much? How can one change...so much? How can reality differs from fantasy...so much? How can I, of all people, feel like a piece of crap. Someone like me...who used to think so much of herself. Who dares to dream so big a dream, people would think I have no mirror to look at myself. lolx.
Where has my dignity gone to?
Where is my ego?
And i thought i was an arrogant fellow.

I gotta find myself back!
Tan Wei Ern! Wake up!!!!!!!!!